Insert Story Name Here
by FindMeBroken
Summary: They had a past that was filled with lust. They're having a present that is filled with hate. Could they possibly have a future that is filled with love? EmJay POSSIBLY PERMANENT HIATUS!
1. First Day Back

My first day back to Degrassi for my final year. Six years I've been coming here, regularly, every morning.

My first year, seventh grade. I met Sean. I fell in love for the first time. Then, he did something violent and we split.

My second year, eighth grade. Sean and I got back together at my mother and teacher's wedding. It's disturbing to even think that my mother is married to my teacher but he's not just a teacher to me anymore. He's my father.

My third year, freshman year. Sean met up with Jay and his Crew. They undoubtedly pulled him away from me. Or at least that's what I tell myself because I don't want to even think that he left me out of his own will. Or maybe I did already admit it and that was the first step on my downward spiral into the dark pit where I now reside.

My fourth year, sophomore year. The year of the shooting. That's something that if I talk about I might as well just start digging deeper into my pit of despair. Sean left. He couldn't deal with the fact of being a hero for saving my life. I probably could've left too and people wouldn't have blamed me. I was almost shot, for God's sake! And with the stress came Jay. He's like fire. Wherever there's smoke, there's Jay. And there wasn't just smoke at the ravine. There was the van. He brought me in, showed me around, and then kissed me. One thing lead to the next and I ended up getting a vaccination against my disease—gonorrhea.

Then there was my fifth year, junior year. I met Peter. He filmed my best friend, Manny, drunkenly flashing his camera. As if that wasn't bad enough, he e-mailed it around school. I wish I could've hated him forever, because then things wouldn't have gotten so out of hand. He started to like me, and boy was he persistent. We started to secretly date. Things were going great until I had the genius idea to 'take control'. I put Manny and myself on a drastic diet that included not eating and purging frequently. Manny stopped, saying it was crazy, but I was determined and also, without realizing it at the time, really stupid. As if almost getting shot and getting an STD wasn't enough, I also had to make myself anorexic and bulimic. When Manny threatened to tell my parents about my disorder, I told her I was only doing it because of the stress of keeping from her the fact that I was dating Peter. She was pissed, which is what I had predicted. Hence, keeping our relationship a secret. But then I had a panic attack. It was brought on by stress, which is what I had told Manny, but the doctor also pointed out, it was caused by lack of nourishment. I was officially diagnosed and put under intense watch. My parents said I wouldn't have the privilege of eating alone for a few years. Just like I didn't have the privilege of having a computer in my room for a few years after I was almost raped by an online sex offender.

I've thought a lot of bad things about myself and I know people have thought things about me too. They probably think I was so scared when Rick almost shot me or that I was so stupid for purging. A lot of people probably felt bad for me too. Maybe I was looking for their pity. But I was too out of my mind to know. People thought I was a slut when they heard about what I did at the ravine. But that died down after awhile. Only a few people still talk about it but everyone's always talking about the shooting and about how I passed out in the hallway from starvation. But I don't get it because the one thing that I'm constantly mentally kicking myself for is getting into that van.

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I didn't want to go back to school. I thought I was so lucky that I was expelled. I wouldn't be going to college so what did it matter what my record said? But when Spinner went back to the school to beg to be let back in, apparently he made it sound like I wanted to go back too. So a few weeks ago I get a letter in the mail telling me that I was starting school in three days. Couldn't they have sent the letter with at least a weeks notice? Of course not. It's Degrassi.

I had pressed the snooze button what seemed like thirty seconds ago but it must have been ten minutes because my alarm started blaring again. I reached up and hit the off button. The irritating ringing ceased. I debated lying back down and sleeping until noon. But I sighed and stood up. I had to go back to school. If I didn't there would be three people standing on my doorstep by 3:30 this afternoon.

The first would be Spinner. He would probably run to oh so humble abode right after final bell and start rambling about how I could just ditch school after all he went through to get us back in. I would slam the door in his face and then within a matter of minutes Liberty Van Zandt would be standing in the same place. News travels fast in Degrassi. I mean, news travels fast in all schools. But it travels faster than light in the hallowed halls of Degrassi Central School. Van Zandt would've heard that I was let back in and then would've come to my house wondering why I wasn't there. She would probably have a broken nose from the door hitting her in the face as it closed. The third and most awaited person would be none other than good old Mr. Simpson. I heard he was helping out the new principal while she was getting situated. He would come to warn me that if I didn't show up for three days in a row I would be put in detention. Like I cared. As far as I knew, detention could be where I eat and sleep.

But none of that is going to happen because about five minutes after I got out of bed I sniffed three pairs of jeans to pick which smelled the cleanest, found a tube of toothpaste that wasn't sealed with rust, and ate something that resembled food. I got into my orange Civic and drove the long three-minute drive to the front of the torture chamber.


	2. Class Numbero Uno

The first bell rang and everyone rushed to their classrooms. I looked at my schedule and saw I had English first. Entering the classroom and taking a seat, I looked around to see who was with me.

First I saw Liberty. She was organizing the pencil shavings on her desk. Um, can you say OCD? Not that it's a bad thing. I mean, the show Monk is hilarious.

Then I saw JT. He caught my gaze and smiled at me. I nodded in his direction and scanned some more.

I saw Darcy and Chante laughing about some party they went to over the summer. Then my eyes ventured over to the front of the room. About two seats ahead of me and one seat diagonal sat Peter Stone. He glanced back at me and then did a double take. He smiled and was about to get up to walk over to me but I shook my head. I can't deal with him. Not after what happened between us.

I then looked to the desk in the back corner and my eyes rested on the one and only Jay Hogart. Oh, this was going to be a fun year.

I had forgotten that he would be back. I wouldn't have thought much of him sitting there, well, yes I would, but I wouldn't have thought that much of it if something strange hadn't caught my eye. He was staring very intently at something. It took me a few moments but I realized he was staring at me!

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After first bell I made my way to my first class: English. When I walked in and took a seat in the back corner I looked around the room. Yeah, yeah, whatever. It was the same people I made fun of for being two years younger than me.

That's right, two years. I was held back in kindergarten for getting into a fight and being suspended for so long I couldn't make up the work. Like there was actual work to make up! I guess I just didn't have enough time to color in the twenty pictures of Barney. I only got nineteen done.

Kindergarten was a major rip off. I always got the smallest cookie and when I told the teacher, she didn't care.

I hated kindergarten.

So back to my second shot at senior year. I was looking at all of the people trying to think how I could torture them with this one more year that the school had granted me, when I saw a face that seemed oddly familiar to me but I just couldn't place it.

After a few minutes I realized it was Emma 'Greenpeace' Nelson and she was looking right at me. I couldn't believe that I didn't recognize her. She grew up a lot over the summer. She really got a nice shape to her body and her hair! Don't even get me started on her hair. It was like a shining ocean.

Oh no. I'm getting sappy and using cliché words like 'shining ocean' and all that junk. You see, this is what school does to me.

But Em-I mean Greenpeace-was more than hot. She was…beautiful…in a hot sort of way.

When I realized she realized that I was looking at her I smirked and looked away. Just in time too, because Heather Sin Clair passed by and I couldn't help but notice the nose job she got to fix her nose job. I stifled a laugh as she passed by, shooting daggers at me with her eyes. Eh, too bad. She wasn't very pretty anyway.

Then Ms. Kwan walked in to start the lesson.

"Hello, class. We will be starting off the school year with a project that you could consider a 'getting to know you', 'breaking the ice' type of thing. Everyone will get a piece of paper with their partners name on it and the instructions for the project. You will have all of class today and tomorrow to work on your project but after that it must all be done at home. It's due at the end of next week. Now pair up."

I looked at my paper and saw the name: 'Manuela Santos'.

I looked around the classroom. She wasn't there.

"Ms. Kwan." She looked up at me, "Slight problem. You see, my partner isn't here."

"Who is your partner, Mr. Hogart?"

"Manuela Santos." I said her name with a slight accent but not too much that it sounded mean, although that's kinda what I was going for. I snuck a glance at Greenpeace to see she was looking at me with a disgusted look.

Hey, what did I ever do to her?

Okay, stupid question.

So what? I gave her an STD. It's gone isn't it? No harm, no fowl. And besides, she had fun.

"Okay, well, I guess we will have to pair you up with someone else. Does anyone else not have a partner?" Ms. Kwan looked around the room. I looked, too. Who would be the lucky person that got to work with me?

Then I noticed Greenpeace slowly raising her hand.

"Yes Miss Nelson?" Ms. Kwan asked.

"Um, my partner isn't exactly here either. He hasn't been for over a year, actually."

"Who would that be?" Ms. Kwan asked and I'm pretty sure she sounded annoyed.

"Sean Cameron." Greenpeace said.

"Ah, yes. He is gone, isn't he? Well, then, you can work with Mr. Hogart." Ms. Kwan pointed to me then looked back at her desk.

Greenpeace gave me a look and then got up and moved to sit down next to me.

"Let's just get this over with okay?" She asked, coolly.

"Don't bite, Killer." I shrugged back, smiling a bit.

She didn't catch the joke.

"Just look at the paper." She sighed. Oh, this project will be fun.

After class finished Greenpeace hurried out of the classroom so fast I didn't realize she was gone until I looked up. Then I looked around to make sure no one heard me talking to thin air. Can't ruin the rep.

I hurried out of the class and caught up with Greenpeace.

"So, any hot girls you can set me up with, partner?" I asked, saying the last word with a slight western accent.

"Actually, yeah. There's this new grade eleven. She's pretty and she's looking for someone to show her around, especially a boy. She mentioned that she wanted him to be nice, sweet, and very good looking but I guess you'll have to do." She said.

Ouch, that burned.

"Oh, so I'm not good looking?" I asked, leaning against her locker.

"Mm, no. Not really." She said shaking her head and pushing me out of the way.

"So when can I meet this girl?"

She looked down the hallway and then back at me, "Right now actually."

She grabbed the wrist of a girl that was walking by and turned her around.

"Jay, this is Alice. She's the girl I was telling you about." Greenpeace smiled at me.

The girl had braces, thick-rimmed glasses, and frizzy hair. She wasn't very pretty. Like I said, I always end up with the smallest cookie.


	3. Class Numbero Dose

After setting Devil Boy up with this new grade eleven, Alice, I walked off to my next class: Media Immersion. I got there a bit early.

"Hey, Dad." I said, walking in and taking a seat.

"Oh, hey, Em. How's your first day going?" Snake asked.

"Just dandy." I said, sarcasm dripping from my words.

"What happened?" he looked up from his papers and stared at me.

"I'm paired with the one and only Jay Hogart for the English project." I said with mock enthusiasm.

"Well, I wish there was something I could do, but the teachers are starting to get annoyed with me nosing around in the students business." He let out a laugh.

Just then everyone started making their way into the class.

I took a seat in the back. Manny walked in and spotted me. She took the seat to my right.

Next came Peter and, lucky me, took the seat to me left.

"Hey, Emma." He said, looking over at me as his computer turned on.

"Peter." I nodded at him and turned my computer on.

"Hey, Em. You got a pen?" Manny asked.

"Yeah, right here. Hold on." I looked in my bag and took out a pen, handing it to Manny.

"Thanks." She said, taking it.

"No problem." I logged into my computer and a message popped up.

It said I have a new interschool e-mail.

Who would already be e-mailing me? First period MI was grade ten and most people in this period didn't have their computers on yet.

I opened the message and saw it was from…

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After Emma walked away I looked at this girl. Alice, I think her name was.

"H-hi." She stuttered.

"Hey. Listen, I gotta get to my class. But I hope you're enjoying Degrassi so far." I faked a smile and walked away.

Right before I turned the corner, I overheard her saying to another girl, "He is so hot."

And I don't mean to brag or anything, but I totally think I am. Maybe Emma would be interested in me if I actually washed my hair and brushed my teeth.

Wait a second. Did I just say would Greenpeace be interested in me? And I called her Emma? What's happening to me? This just isn't right.

I have to get laid.

But first I have to get to class.

I walked in to see that I was in a class with Spinner, Jimmy, and Toby. This would be great.

There's just something about all of them that makes us not have a very good relationship.

Spinner got me back into school. Note to self: Kill Spinner.

I, through order of events, got Jimmy shot. Note to self: Apologize to Jimmy. He's rich. Who knows what thugs he can pay to kill me.

And then there was Toby. Rick's one and only friend. Once again, I, through order of events, caused Rick to bring that gun to school. Note to self: Never look Toby in the eye or even talk to him for that matter.

Class started and, yippee, we were doing another partner project. I looked at my paper.

Jimmy Brooks.

Great.

I looked up to see him glaring at me.

He raised his hand, "I want a new partner."

Yes, please.

But the teacher just had to decline, "I'm sorry, sir, but I don't switch partners. I also have a no tolerance rule, for future reference."

This guy was obviously new. Tolerance is the one thing that teachers _do_ need at Degrassi.


	4. Class Numbero Tres

After the bell rang, I headed to third period, Ancient Art. As I entered I realized this was going to be a small class, seeing as only five other people were sitting there and the second bell already rang. Just as I was taking a seat, Jay walked in.

"You've gotta be kidding me!" Gina, one of the girls from the ravine, said.

"What is _he_ doing in this class?" Brenda, another ravine slut, asked.

I just sighed, and to my luck, he took the seat next to me.

"Hey Greenpeace." He whispered.

"Hi." I said back, sounding happy to see him.

Obviously, he was surprised that I didn't just glare at him, because he was speechless. No big come back. Nothing. Now I was surprised.

"Wow." I said.

"What?" he asked.

"You have nothing to say back. That's a first."

He was about to reply but the teacher walked in.

"Okay, I know that so many other teachers already have projects for you for the first day. But…I don't care. So I will be letting you pick your partners. Go, go." The teacher turned her back on us.

I looked around the classroom. Brenda and Gina were obviously partners, in much more than art projects.

There were two Japanese foreign exchange students that looked to be working together.

And then there was Peter.

Is he following me? He's in all my classes!

And I don't want to work with him.

So I turned to Jay, "Wanna be my partner?"

"Of course." Jay answered.

I smiled and then looked at my desk, grumbling.

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Jimmy didn't look too happy.

Too bad.

This was just gonna have to happen.

But I'm Jay Hogart.

I can handle anything.

Right?

Anyway, we came up with some stupid idea for this stupid project and then the bell rang.

I headed to my next class: Ancient Art.

I know, this class doesn't exactly scream me, but it was easy and the only thing that was open.

So when I entered I was surprised-yet slightly happy (I have no idea why)-when I saw Greenpeace.

I took the seat next to her. The only other people in the class were two ravine girls that haven't talked to me since the STD epidemic, two Japanese chicks that were looking at me all goo goo eyed, and Peter Stone. God, I hate that kid.

He's the one that filmed and e-mailed Manny Santos's breasts to the whole school. He's also Emma's-I mean Greenpeace's-ex boyfriend. Apparently she was going through a "rough" time (like she even knows what rough is) and she had anorexia or something. Eventually she recovered and everyone was happy that she was eating again. Well, not everyone. Whenever she got hungry when she was on a date with Stone, he would refuse to get food. He'd say things like, "We're gonna be late for the movie. Eat later." Or "Let's make out first." And then there was the one I got to witness. The famous, "You're too fat. Stop eating so much."

So I ended up sitting next to Emma. There was a project assigned and now I'm partnered with Emma too.

Ugh, her name's Greenpeace! God damnit, Jay. Get your act together!

Although, Emma is a really nice name. It's much prettier than Greenpeace. And she's much prettier than when I first started calling her Greenpeace.

So I'll stop yelling at myself when I call her Emma, because basically, it's driving me crazy.

"What do you want to make our collage about?" Emma asked me.

"Uh, how about sexy British super models?" I suggested. She just rolled her eyes and I figured that wasn't the right answer. So I tried again, "How about we do, like, a play on the pyramids, or something?"

"Please explain." She said.

I nodded and continued, "Well, we could, like, cut out all of these pictures from magazines. Little spots of gold or yellow or tan, whatever color we decide on, and we could glue them all together in the shape of the pyramids. But then there will kinda be like a bigger picture after we finish with the pyramids. Like that they are really a cat's ears or the obstacles in a pinball machine."

Emma stared at me wide-eyed.

"What?" I asked.

"It's just that, you _look_ so stupid."

I guess you could call it heart to heart, if you could call The Exorcist a comedy.


	5. Second Day

I woke up at 6:00 to get ready for school. While I was taking my shower I thought about how I already have two projects to do with Jay and it's only the second day.

For English we decided to write a "diary" of a slave in New Orleans during the Civil War.

The requirements were it had to be about something we haven't experienced personally, it had to have three descriptive paragraphs, and it had to be written in the first person. We figured our idea would work.

I wasn't exactly psyched about having three descriptive paragraphs about dead soldiers but Jay seemed very excited so I told him he could write them and fill me in later.

I finished with my shower and quickly got dressed in a pair of low-rise jeans and a white off the shoulder sweater. Sure it was September, but it was still pretty chilly here in good old T.O.

Okay, so maybe Jay isn't that bad. I mean, I wouldn't go out and marry him. I definitely don't love him. I don't even think I like him. Not even remotely. But he's a potential friend.

I hopped into my mother's old car, which I can proudly say is now officially mine, and I drove to school. As I was driving into the parking lot I was cut off by an orange Civic that I recognized as Jay's. If it was anyone else I probably would've just rolled my eyes and cursed them off under my breath. Usually, if I saw that it was Jay, I would've gotten out of the car and started screaming at him. But for some reason today felt different.

I just nodded and continued to search for an empty parking space. Finally I found one and headed in just in time for homeroom.

Sitting down in my seat, I scanned the room, looking for Jay. He wasn't there.

But I just saw him out front.

Finally the bell rang and I headed to first period. Jay wasn't there either.

So I started working on the diary. I had gotten a lot in, but I wasn't sure if Jay would agree with what I was saying.

I'm not sure to be worried because he's not there, or to be angry that he's most likely skipping class.

But, hey, I skip class sometimes too.

And Media Immersion would be a great class to skip today. After getting that e-mail from Peter telling me that he wants me back, I don't think I could stand going in there and sitting next to him.

So after English ended I headed out the front door and walked to Jay's car. I saw him sitting in the drivers seat with his head on the steering wheel. He looked like he was sleeping. I was about to knock on the window when I noticed the blood dripping down the steering wheel. It was coming from somewhere on his face. I quickly opened the door.

"Jay. Jay. Talk to me, Jay." I said, while turning his face towards me.

He had a busted lip, bloody nose, three teeth missing, and was obviously knocked out. I closed the door and ran around to the other side where I got in. Taking his head in my lap I started to clean him up.

What happened?

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When I drove into school the morning of the second day of school, I cut off a small, blue car. When I looked in my rearview window and saw it was Emma, I cursed at myself under my breath, but I kept looking for a spot anyway.

Finally I pulled into an empty space. I was about to open my door when the front of my car seemed to sink. I tried looking out the front window and someone jumped up, knife in hand.

I recognized the guy as a bigot I used to drink with at the Ravine.

I opened my window and called out, "Dude, what's up?"

He lunged at me and I quickly rolled the window back up.

But not soon enough. He reached in and opened my door, pulling me out onto the curb.

The last thing I remembered was his fist driving into my stomach.

Then I woke up with my head on Emma's lap and she was stroking my face with her forefinger.

When she realized I was awake she quickly stopped, "Oh, are you okay? What happened?"

I just shook my head and tried to sit up but I fell back into her lap.

I think I caught a smirk on her lips but then again I could have been hallucinating with my condition.

I managed a weak smile, "Thanks." I muttered.

She put a finger to my mouth as if telling me to be quiet and I quickly obeyed, falling back into a deep sleep.


End file.
